Monday, 25 February 2008

Attempt to Simplify English.

We all know that English is quite a difficult language to master what with all the double meanings and the extra-ordinary pronunciations. But the aspect of the English language that is the most difficult to grasp is the spelling. And blame it on the French! (the language, I mean, not the people esp. not the hot French girls) I mean why is ren-dez-vous pronounced like how a Canadian would say round-a-bout. Apparently, it is this influence that egged the English to pronounce the words irrespective of how they were spelled. And this can be very annoying for a novice at the language. It is in the hope to simplify this aspect that I present the following suggestions.

One of the things in the English spelling that has trouble me are the double letters. I mean, they don't make any difference while pronouncing the word. So why keep them? So, we can do away with the double leters. Another anoying thing are the silent leters. Like there is no 'b' in doubt or debt, and the extraneous 'e' at the end of most of the words such as there, table etc serves no purpose whatsoever. It definitely does not provide end-suport to those words. So of course, the silent leters ar out to. Now, yu can notic how esy evrything is now.

Now, another anoying thing about th languag is th use of vowels for rong sounds. This definitly provids a lot of confusion. So we eliminat th problem by fixing th vowel sounds as thus:
a wil hav th sound as in cut, but etc.
e wil hav th sound as in fret, det etc.
i wil hav th sound as in fish, mis etc.
o wil hav th sound as in cot, froth etc.
u wil hav th sound as in put, good etc.
aa wil hav th sound as in car, park etc.
ee wil hav th sound as in cat, that etc.
This wil obviasli teek taaim tu get iusd tu, bat it wil carteenli bi isiar in tha long ran. (Not: tha dabal vowals bing iusd hiar aar onli diu tu tha presenc of onli faaiv vowals in Inglish. If iu wont, iu ceen ius α in plec of aa and ε in plec of ee.)

Inglish olso hees ridandent letars. For exaampal, tha letar 'c'. Haaf tha taaim, it hees tha saaund of 'k' end et athar taaims, it is pronaauncd es 's'. Tha sem problam is with 'v' end 'w' bing tha sem saaund. So, wi ceen riplec 'c' with it's epropriet saaund end olso riples 'w' with 'v'. On tha sem laains, 'th' keen bi riplesd baai 'd'. End iu mast hev olredi notisd deet vi hev dan ave vid da letar 'y' tu.

'X' keen olso bi sabstitiuted vid 'ks', 'ph' vid 'f' etc. Samtaaims, 'g' meks da saaund of 'j' ees in garaag. Dis keen bi solvd baai speling it ees garaaj. End 'z' hees da sem saaund es 'j' tu. So, vi eliminet 'z' oltugedar. Iu keen faaind meni sach sabstitiutians on ior on. Naau, ol dis maait sim veri difikalt et da fast gleens, bat vid propar prektis, aai em siur dat enivan vil bi ebal tu maastar it.

If iu kam ap vid mor ves tu simplifaai Inglish es a lenguej, iu keen let mi no in da kaments sekshan (tion hees bin riplesd baai shan). Thenk iu for ior taaim.

PS: MS Ward gev mi a hel lot of trabal vid dis aartikal.